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Post by Deleted on Jun 6, 2008 7:18:10 GMT
A man from Liverpool walks into the local Job Centre, marches straight up to the counter and says, 'Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing benefits. I'd really rather have a job.'
The social worker behind the counter says, 'Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter. You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips.You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided atwo-bedroom apartment above the garage. The starting salary is £200,000 a year.'
The guy, wide-eyed, says, 'You're bullshittin' me!'
The Social Worker says, 'Yeah, well... You started it.'
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Jun 6, 2008 10:14:56 GMT
LOL!
Patsy
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Post by pearly queen on Jun 6, 2008 19:51:46 GMT
LOL! Very good.
I know a similar one....
A man goes into a Job Centre looking for a job - anything will do.
The person behind the counter says 'There's a vacancy here that might suit you: Gynaecologist's Assistant, at the local hospital.' 'What does that involve' asks the job seeker. The Job Centre guy replies 'You need to look after ladies before they see the gynaecologist - take their clothes off, and prepare them for examination by putting their feet in the stirrups, using lubrication on them and making sure they're good and ready. Do you think you could be interested in this vacancy?' 'Not arf!!' says the bloke 'How do I apply?' 'Fill in this application form - and then go to Ipswich for the interview'. 'Ipswich?' asks the hopeful applicant, puzzled. 'Yes' explains Job Centre man 'that's where the queue starts.'
Boom boom!
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Post by Deleted on Jun 7, 2008 3:35:05 GMT
;D ;D ;D
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