Post by RitaLittlewood on Jun 1, 2005 20:13:28 GMT
I originally wrote this tribute to 10 years of the Dingles last October and posted it on the Talk Corrie guestbook. So, since there's now a Delilah Dingle, I thought I'd post it here:
It was a quiet day in The Kabin as usual. A few people had bought a paper, one bought a packet of mints and no one wanted a stamp so Norris was left on his own again while Reet took yet another day off. A couple of men walked in. Norris didn't take to them at all. One was bearded with a flat cap and the other was a drunken scruffbag. Still, customers were customers, Norris reasoned as he sighed heavily, and Reet was obsessed with her profits. "Can I help you?"
"Aye," the man with the flat cap replied. "We've come to see Reet."
"She's unavailable at the moment," Norris said. "Perhaps I can help."
"It's private," the drunken one slurred before belching loudly.
"And important," the other added.
"Oh, very well," Norris sighed. "Just a moment." He went through the the back and called up the stairs, "Reet. Someone here to see you."
"Just coming!" they all heard a voice followed by footsteps. "Out!" she yelled, pointing at the door as soon as she saw them.
"But, aunty Delilah, we've come a long way," the flat-capped one pleaded.
"Aunty Delilah?" Norris mumbled curiously and felt his nose twitch as it always did when he hit on some juicy gossip.
Reet sensed this so grabbed his nose and twisted it. "Shurrup, peasant!" she hissed. "Yer say owt about these two and yer'll regret it. Understand?"
"Yes," Norris said meekly and she let him go.
"That's our aunty Delilah," the drunken one remarked.
"Aye," the other concurred. "Once a Dingle, always a Dingle," he added proudly.
"It's no wonder I've always fancied her," the drunk leered.
"Yer fancy owt with a pulse, yer filthy git," Reet replied. "What do yer want Zak and Shadrach?"
"We need your help, aunty Delilah," Zak told her as he removed his cap respectfully.
"Zak, yer know I left all that behind me. I'm not a Dingle no more. I mean, any more," she said firmly.
"But aunty Delilah," Zak continued. "You know as well as I do you can call yourself whatever you like. The Dingle bond never breaks."
"I know what I would like to break," Reet added, looking directly at Shadrach.
"You and the rest of the family," Zak laughed.
"He needs a good spanking," Reet said.
"Oh, please," Shadrach replied as he stepped closer and put his hand around her waist.
"Geroff yer perv!" she shrieked as she whacked him over the head.
"Ooh, I love it when you talk mean to me," Shadrach grinned.
Reet curled her lip then returned her gaze to Zak. "If it's money yer after-"
"Course not, aunty Delilah," he said. "We can get all we need off our Charity since she seems to get millionaires. No, it's more important than that."
"Yer sure yer a Dingle?" Reet raised her eyebrow. "Well, never mind. Whatever it is, I'm not interested. I have me life here. No one knows about me past, except the one I made up. Sorry. Let yerselves out." She went out the back.
"Well, Shadrach," Zak began dejectedly, "looks like it's up to you and me to sort out Soloman."
"You know what Soloman's like, our Zak," Shadrach told him. "Count me out."
At that moment Reet reappeared. "Soloman's up to his old tricks again, is he?"
Zak grinned as he nudged his brother. "Aye, aunty Delilah. He still thinks he's the Dingle King and even got our house and then gave it to our Sam."
"How the heck did he manage that?" Reet shrieked.
"Zak took up his challenge and lost," Shadrach gloated.
"All right, Shadrach," Zak hissed, getting annoyed.
Reet folded her arms. "NOW I know why yer want me help. I'll get me coat. Oh, and Norris?"
"Y-yes, Reet?" he stammered nervously.
"Remember what I told yer. We Dingles hold grudges and yer wouldn't want to mess with us," she said menacingly. "How many are there now, Zak?"
"Lost count," he replied. "More than seventy. And we always work together when one of us is wronged."
Norris began to quake in his Hush Puppies. "I won't breath a word, Reet" he croaked. "You can rely on me."
"That'll be a first," she noted. "Won't be a tick."
The van pulled up at the Dingle's home in Emmerdale. "Here we are, aunty Delilah," Zak said as he helped her out.
"Ta," she said, with an enormous smile on her face as she watched Shadrach nurse his bleeding nose.
"You've probably broken it, you evil old bag!" she yelled.
"Try that again and it'll not be the only thing I'll break," she said. "Right, now where's Soloman?"
"In the house with our Sam," Zak pointed. "Good luck." He held his hand out.
"It's Soloman who'll be needed the luck," she pointed out before marching up to the front door and kicking it down. Zak and Shadrach followed and stood in the doorway. "Ah, there yer are, Soloman," she said. I hear yer've been causing trouble again."
Soloman jumped up shocked. "Mam!"
"What do yer think yer playing at?" she yelled. "Give Zak his house back and clear off before I belt yer one."
Soloman's whole gruff exterior changed to one of a naughty boy. "Anything you say, mam," he nodded eagerly then left, snarling at Zak."
Reet rubbed her hands. "There. Problem solved. Get us a few cans. Dealing with that brat of mine always were thirsty work."
Zak gladly got a 4-pack out of the fridge and handed them to her then opened one for himself. "A toast. To aunty Delilah, Queen of the Dingles."
"I'll drink to that! Reet said, sat with her legs on the coffee table, gulped down a large mouthful of the beer and gave a loud belch. "Ah, it's good to get back to me roots. Cheers, lads!"
The End
Patsy
It was a quiet day in The Kabin as usual. A few people had bought a paper, one bought a packet of mints and no one wanted a stamp so Norris was left on his own again while Reet took yet another day off. A couple of men walked in. Norris didn't take to them at all. One was bearded with a flat cap and the other was a drunken scruffbag. Still, customers were customers, Norris reasoned as he sighed heavily, and Reet was obsessed with her profits. "Can I help you?"
"Aye," the man with the flat cap replied. "We've come to see Reet."
"She's unavailable at the moment," Norris said. "Perhaps I can help."
"It's private," the drunken one slurred before belching loudly.
"And important," the other added.
"Oh, very well," Norris sighed. "Just a moment." He went through the the back and called up the stairs, "Reet. Someone here to see you."
"Just coming!" they all heard a voice followed by footsteps. "Out!" she yelled, pointing at the door as soon as she saw them.
"But, aunty Delilah, we've come a long way," the flat-capped one pleaded.
"Aunty Delilah?" Norris mumbled curiously and felt his nose twitch as it always did when he hit on some juicy gossip.
Reet sensed this so grabbed his nose and twisted it. "Shurrup, peasant!" she hissed. "Yer say owt about these two and yer'll regret it. Understand?"
"Yes," Norris said meekly and she let him go.
"That's our aunty Delilah," the drunken one remarked.
"Aye," the other concurred. "Once a Dingle, always a Dingle," he added proudly.
"It's no wonder I've always fancied her," the drunk leered.
"Yer fancy owt with a pulse, yer filthy git," Reet replied. "What do yer want Zak and Shadrach?"
"We need your help, aunty Delilah," Zak told her as he removed his cap respectfully.
"Zak, yer know I left all that behind me. I'm not a Dingle no more. I mean, any more," she said firmly.
"But aunty Delilah," Zak continued. "You know as well as I do you can call yourself whatever you like. The Dingle bond never breaks."
"I know what I would like to break," Reet added, looking directly at Shadrach.
"You and the rest of the family," Zak laughed.
"He needs a good spanking," Reet said.
"Oh, please," Shadrach replied as he stepped closer and put his hand around her waist.
"Geroff yer perv!" she shrieked as she whacked him over the head.
"Ooh, I love it when you talk mean to me," Shadrach grinned.
Reet curled her lip then returned her gaze to Zak. "If it's money yer after-"
"Course not, aunty Delilah," he said. "We can get all we need off our Charity since she seems to get millionaires. No, it's more important than that."
"Yer sure yer a Dingle?" Reet raised her eyebrow. "Well, never mind. Whatever it is, I'm not interested. I have me life here. No one knows about me past, except the one I made up. Sorry. Let yerselves out." She went out the back.
"Well, Shadrach," Zak began dejectedly, "looks like it's up to you and me to sort out Soloman."
"You know what Soloman's like, our Zak," Shadrach told him. "Count me out."
At that moment Reet reappeared. "Soloman's up to his old tricks again, is he?"
Zak grinned as he nudged his brother. "Aye, aunty Delilah. He still thinks he's the Dingle King and even got our house and then gave it to our Sam."
"How the heck did he manage that?" Reet shrieked.
"Zak took up his challenge and lost," Shadrach gloated.
"All right, Shadrach," Zak hissed, getting annoyed.
Reet folded her arms. "NOW I know why yer want me help. I'll get me coat. Oh, and Norris?"
"Y-yes, Reet?" he stammered nervously.
"Remember what I told yer. We Dingles hold grudges and yer wouldn't want to mess with us," she said menacingly. "How many are there now, Zak?"
"Lost count," he replied. "More than seventy. And we always work together when one of us is wronged."
Norris began to quake in his Hush Puppies. "I won't breath a word, Reet" he croaked. "You can rely on me."
"That'll be a first," she noted. "Won't be a tick."
The van pulled up at the Dingle's home in Emmerdale. "Here we are, aunty Delilah," Zak said as he helped her out.
"Ta," she said, with an enormous smile on her face as she watched Shadrach nurse his bleeding nose.
"You've probably broken it, you evil old bag!" she yelled.
"Try that again and it'll not be the only thing I'll break," she said. "Right, now where's Soloman?"
"In the house with our Sam," Zak pointed. "Good luck." He held his hand out.
"It's Soloman who'll be needed the luck," she pointed out before marching up to the front door and kicking it down. Zak and Shadrach followed and stood in the doorway. "Ah, there yer are, Soloman," she said. I hear yer've been causing trouble again."
Soloman jumped up shocked. "Mam!"
"What do yer think yer playing at?" she yelled. "Give Zak his house back and clear off before I belt yer one."
Soloman's whole gruff exterior changed to one of a naughty boy. "Anything you say, mam," he nodded eagerly then left, snarling at Zak."
Reet rubbed her hands. "There. Problem solved. Get us a few cans. Dealing with that brat of mine always were thirsty work."
Zak gladly got a 4-pack out of the fridge and handed them to her then opened one for himself. "A toast. To aunty Delilah, Queen of the Dingles."
"I'll drink to that! Reet said, sat with her legs on the coffee table, gulped down a large mouthful of the beer and gave a loud belch. "Ah, it's good to get back to me roots. Cheers, lads!"
The End
Patsy
