|
|
Post by jessi on Oct 30, 2006 17:03:13 GMT
Wonderful Patsy! I love it
|
|
|
|
Post by sallywebster on Oct 31, 2006 18:54:06 GMT
Excellent entry Patsy!
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 7, 2006 13:16:32 GMT
Greetings peasants!
Yep, me again, who some call the wrinkled old prune. I'll give yer wrinkled old prunes when I clap me panda eyes on yer so be warned!
So an update on me whereabouts seeing as I've been watching via bootleg Sky in my posh hotel room and have heard tell me peasant is claiming I had an operation on me foot and have to stay because of DVT. DVT me foot! Yes I had to have an operation but it were because I ripped me surgically attached black trousers while chasing what I thought were an elderly millionaire and needed them replaced as an emergency. Typical peasant getting wrong end of t'stick, though not when I whack him with one he don't. They don't allow booze so I said to him I'd had DVT which were an abbreviation of double vodka and tonic so they wouldn't kick me out. After all, I could do with the rest from the peasant and t'insurance company's picking up the bill. What more can a girl ask for? Who said I weren't a girl? Wanna belt? Anyroad he immediately latched on the DVT bit and now has gone telling 9 million people that's what's wrong with me! He were born thick that one and always will be, no matter how much I literally try and knock some sense into him.
Till next time!
Queen Reet
|
|
|
|
Post by valda on Nov 7, 2006 13:37:24 GMT
DVT Double Vodka and Tonic ,LOL  Long Live Queen Reet, Well Done Patsy good one R.O..F.L |
|
|
|
Post by pearly queen on Nov 8, 2006 20:52:46 GMT
Psssst, Reet. I'm not usually a grass - but Norris is acting like the lord of the manor in your gracious absence: treating Ken like a skivvy and pigging out on the sherbert lemons all day.
He's also running the kettle, the cash till and shop central heating from the leccy piped down from your flat, and has had several showers and baths up there.
By the time you get back the Kabin will be bankrupt - you need a Hungarian millionaire more than ever now. Boldog vadaszat! (happy hunting)
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 9, 2006 12:57:19 GMT
LMAO! Ooh you little stirrer, Pearly.  Patsy |
|
|
|
Post by jessi on Nov 10, 2006 21:10:19 GMT
It rocked Patsy!! |
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 19, 2006 20:16:03 GMT
Greetings peasants - and Pearly Queen! Pearly love yer have no idea how pleased I am yer turned grass. I'll sort that little bugger out when I'm back on Friday. He won't know what's hit him till I do - with one of Charlie Stubbs's sledgehammers! Or perhaps two. A stereo bashing! Oh yes. I like the sound of that. Yes I shall be back. Aren't yer all celebrating with joy at such wonderful news? Oh belt up! Yer should all bow down and kiss me feet and not complain about how they stink. Yer should be grateful I'd even let yer lot anywhere near 'em to worship me. Yer know I know yer all adore me and yer lives would be a helluva lot more dull without me to brighten yer days. I'm off to try and bag me a zillionaire. Time's rapidly running out with them dragging me back so soon. Whatever happened to 5 weeks off at this time of year? I'll have words. They're working me far too hard. Don't they realise megastars should be glorified extras and not have to work for their overinflated salaries? Ignorant peasants the lot of 'em! Till next time! Queen Reet |
|
|
|
Post by sallywebster on Nov 19, 2006 20:24:08 GMT
Eee I cannot wait for yer return on Friday - I even had a dream about yer t'other night. Im not kissing yer feet though, I cant imagine how awful that would be!
Jez
|
|
|
|
Post by pearly queen on Nov 19, 2006 22:44:04 GMT
Queen Reet - from one HRH to another: you shouldn't be expected to wear out your waving arm by working too hard - get onto the union.
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 20, 2006 11:49:37 GMT
LOL!
Patsy
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 22, 2006 21:00:51 GMT
Greetings peasants! Only two days until I return. As Tina Turner says, are yer ready for me? Mind yer, she don't have the accent. What do yer mean no? Well GET ready! Peasants! Tut! Yer know I'm the only reason yer all watch. Yer know I'm the best thing in it and always have been. Yer know yer not watching waiting for me to quit. Every one of yer is so excited at me returning to deal with me useless handmaiden and will be on the edge of yer seats waiting for me to belt him with the toffee whirl jar. And I am hopping mad! No, that weren't a pun cos they reckon I've had an accident with me foot. I'm mad cos they brought me back too soon and haven't given me, the only true megastar in the world these days, more time off! So peasant won't be the only one to suffer. Jez, yer'll kiss me feet if it's t'last thing yer ever do! Yer know yer love me enough to do it. Right time to put me face on. That'll take until at least Friday. Have to look good for all me fans as well as frighten Norris when I walk through t'door. What do yer mean Halloween were last month? It's always Halloween in 'tKabin! Till next time! Queen Reet |
|
|
|
Post by sallywebster on Nov 22, 2006 21:18:39 GMT
Jez, yer'll kiss me feet if it's t'last thing yer ever do! Yer know yer love me enough to do it. Queen Reet, if I did kiss yer feet it would be last thing i'd do an all as id be that ill afterwards. |
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 22, 2006 21:20:59 GMT
You'll be dead afterwards. After all, her stinky feet are her secret weapon.  Patsy |
|
|
|
Post by sallywebster on Nov 22, 2006 22:44:45 GMT
Is she after me cash?
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 22, 2006 22:45:57 GMT
What do you think?
Patsy
|
|
|
|
Post by sallywebster on Nov 23, 2006 19:53:30 GMT
Well she'll have a job as mine is hiddden! LOL!
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Nov 23, 2006 20:16:32 GMT
She'll find it. She hasa nose that sniffs out money as well as booze!
Patsy
|
|
|
|
Post by jessi on Nov 30, 2006 21:15:02 GMT
love it, love it, love it!
|
|
|
|
Post by pearly queen on Dec 7, 2006 17:08:57 GMT
Reet - how much are you paying that kid to tag the Kabin?
It must be worth every penny to stress Norris out and to be able to stand and watch him with the marigolds on.
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Dec 7, 2006 23:04:28 GMT
Greetings peasants! They're working me far too hard this year. I'm knackered. Where's me voddy? I need summat to keep me stamina up. No idea what peasant uses and I don't wanna know neither. I'm shuddering at t'thought. Did yer all know he's a perv? That's what he really bought them night vision goggles for. Not to catch a peek at me in me skimpies. I'd give him night goggles if he so much as thought it. No it's to see what sort of undies Jason Grimshaw wears. The idiot thought they were x-ray goggles. Ha! Pearly dear. Me pay? Yer must be kidding! I just threatened to sing if he didn't do what I wanted. That always does the trick. Till next time! Queen Reet |
|
|
|
Post by jessi on Dec 8, 2006 7:16:00 GMT
I always love reading this
|
|
|
|
Post by valda on Dec 8, 2006 8:55:41 GMT
long live Queen Reet LOL thank you for cheering me up |
|
|
|
Post by sallywebster on Dec 8, 2006 18:08:12 GMT
Well done Patsy, that was so good!
|
|
|
|
Post by RitaLittlewood on Dec 8, 2006 21:12:04 GMT
She was obviously too exhausted after being in practically every ep since returning to write much. LOL!
Patsy
|
|
Long Live Queen Reet, 
