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Post by RitaLittlewood on Dec 21, 2007 19:39:29 GMT
LOL! I'm sure she'd love the thought of making more cash but have the vapours at the thought of spending any.
Patsy
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Post by sallywebster on Dec 21, 2007 21:57:03 GMT
LOL! She also said she was ill when she replied to you. Patsy What was her excuse when she replied to others then, like Theo (and she wrote a letter to him)  |
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Dec 21, 2007 22:20:10 GMT
On her deathbed? Forged?
Patsy
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Jan 20, 2008 22:24:09 GMT
Greetings peasants! Tis I, the greatest redhead to ever live who has a permanent contract with Scaffolders R Us and Scary Wigs Ltd. So Vera Duckworth is dead. Poor Jack. Poor, poor, rich Jack! Yes, he will come into a nice little inheritance now with her life insurance and the sale of number nine. I hope I didn't come across as too keen when I were consoling him on his doorstep. Okay so won't be interested in t'physical side of a relationship which suits me down to t'ground. I'll just have to lure him into me mummified clutches which won't be too difficult as I'm an expert and he's vulnerable right now. Tyrone and Molly see me as a kind, caring lady so I'll have no problem convincing them I have genuine feelings for Jack's cash - I mean Jack. And he has a heart condition - perfect! ;D Shouldn't have to live with him too long then as long as I - and it pains me to say this - seduce him!  I'll do owt to get that increase to me Swiss bank accounts as soon as. High time I had a hubby of me own to bury again instead of making up t'numbers at other people's funerals who leave me nowt. Ungrateful lot! I only go for the free booze. Now I can't make me move too early. I'll leave it till at least after the funeral. Wake ought to do it. That'll be soon enough. Time to start planning me next wedding when I become Mrs Duckworth for a couple of weeks! ;D Till next time! Empress Reet |
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Post by amyablume on Jan 21, 2008 15:08:36 GMT
LOL! Dear Empress,
You go on and get those geezers!
Amy
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Jan 21, 2008 19:10:27 GMT
As soon as she heard Vera was dead, her brain went kerching at the thought of the cash and she was practically all over him! She doesn't fool me.  Patsy |
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 16, 2008 13:35:54 GMT
Greetings peasants!
That Jack Duckworth's playing hard to get. Is he a woman? I always thought he enjoyed wearing a frock too much when he pretended to be Ida Fagg. I'm gonna have to up me game to get that ring on me finger at Easter. For a start off I've got to lose Emily. Now she's one of me best friends whose heart's in t'right place and I love her dearly but she in't half cramping me style! She never leaves me alone with him. I need to say them vows, especially the love and cherish part cos I will - love and cherish all his cash! They did me out of the millionaires so, even though Jack's not catch and his inheritance is a pittance compared to what I could've had from Mike, Fred or Paul, there's no way that lot what think they're in charge are gonna do it to me again! Jack may not be the world's greatest catch but as he's got money he's me perfect fella! ;D
Till next time!
Empress Reet (soon to be Empress Reet Duckworth)
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Post by sallywebster on Feb 16, 2008 17:23:41 GMT
LOL! Good luck.
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 16, 2008 18:09:15 GMT
She'll need it, and preferably before he gives the bookies all his money. LOL!
Patsy
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Post by sallywebster on Feb 17, 2008 10:12:40 GMT
LOL Very good Ms Littlewood, have a k
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 17, 2008 14:21:40 GMT
Ta, Jezziekins. Want me to sing?
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Post by sallywebster on Feb 17, 2008 19:53:48 GMT
Go on then.
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 17, 2008 21:31:57 GMT
Yer really a glutton for punishment, aren't yer? Or are yer really tone deaf but not told anyone? Okay. Yer asked for it, complete with mid-Atlantic accent soon as I've lubricated me tonsils with voddy. *gargles* That's better.
Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you
Embrace me, you irreplaceable you
Just one look at you my hearrrrrrrt grrrrrrrrrrew tipsy in me
You and you alone bring out the gypsy in me
I love all the many charrrrrrrrrrms about you
But above all I want my arrrrrrrrrrrms about you
Don't be a naughty baby
Come to mama
Come to mama do
My sweet embraceable you
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Post by sallywebster on Feb 17, 2008 22:19:14 GMT
LMAO!
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 17, 2008 22:22:35 GMT
Want another? *glug glug* I'm lubricating in a better way now.
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Post by amyablume on Feb 18, 2008 18:51:02 GMT
LOL!
I'm surprised Great Britain doesn't run out of Voddy!
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 18, 2008 19:15:42 GMT
The Russian economy would collapse if they ran out that's for sure. LOL!
Patsy
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 27, 2008 22:01:43 GMT
Greetings peasants! Well no doubt yer'll all have noticed that soap - I mean, drama serial yer all watch has been a heck of a lot duller without yers truly gracing it with me presence for over a week. That's cos I'm too busy preparing to become Mrs Duckworth to bother turning up. Jack's cash is far more important than slogging me guts out for a few words no matter how handsomely I get paid for doing nowt! ;D See how young and gorgeous I were last week? I'm looking younger than I did when I first joined but no one's noticed yet. Always knew they were stupid. And see I'm pregnant? I deliberately took me massive tent off so everyone got a good look at me bulge. This is how I'll trap him. I mean get him to do the decent thing. I look youthful enough to still be fertile even though I could never have kids. Should do after paying enough for all that sandblasting and extra Polyfilla since that Super Strength one last time failed within weeks. Friday's the big day. Being leap year it's me turn to do the proposing and I know he'll jump at waking up next to me each morning for the rest of his life, short though it'll be. After that ring's on me finger at Easter I'll tell him it were a false alarm and I've just eaten too many cream cakes. Not a lot he can do then, can he? Waddya mean he can leave? Not if I can help it. Not alive anyroad. Wish me luck! Till next time! Empress Reet Littlewood-Fairclough-Sullivan-Duckworth ;D |
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Post by pearly queen on Feb 27, 2008 22:19:35 GMT
Reeeeet!
Nobody would believe that you would be dumb enough to incubate the new Terry Duckworth, and then bring it into this world. FFS, at least claim that it's Norris's baby - then Jack will run to your rescue, and marry you in a Sean/Violet/Jamie style mad ploy.
Anyway - if you're determined to seduce Jack on Friday, don't forget your curly blonde wig, foghorn voice and your BEST SHOES. He'll be on his knees.
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 27, 2008 22:30:22 GMT
PMSL! She could be doing that very thing, minus pretending the bulge is Norris's. He's bad enough at the best of times without clucking around her all day and night. All she needs to do is get Jack completely off his face Friday which shouldn't be too difficult even if it means *gasp* she buys the drinks! I'm sure she'll see that small and very painful sacrifice as an investment though. Patsy |
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Post by amyablume on Feb 27, 2008 22:31:42 GMT
LOL! Maybe you should bring both wigs don't know which he prefers!! Good Luck!
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Feb 27, 2008 22:32:26 GMT
One for her head and the other for her face? Patsy |
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Post by sallywebster on Mar 1, 2008 9:48:07 GMT
Greetings Queen Reet,
Well its March the 1st now and a Happy St David's Day to you chuck. So how did it go last night with Mr Duckworth?
Kind Regards
Jez
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Post by RitaLittlewood on Mar 1, 2008 14:29:06 GMT
Queen Reet?  If she didn't pull last night she'll be more livid when she seems that insult! Patsy |
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Post by sallywebster on Mar 1, 2008 17:04:47 GMT
Insult? I was being nice! I could always call her a peasant instead! lol
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I'll do owt to get that increase to me Swiss bank accounts as soon as. High time I had a hubby of me own to bury again instead of making up t'numbers at other people's funerals who leave me nowt. Ungrateful lot! I only go for the free booze. Now I can't make me move too early. I'll leave it till at least after the funeral. Wake ought to do it. That'll be soon enough. Time to start planning me next wedding when I become Mrs Duckworth for a couple of weeks! ;D
If she didn't pull last night she'll be more livid when she seems that insult!